Anglican Samizdat

December 21, 2009

Thou shalt not steal

Filed under: Anglican Angst — David Jenkins @ 9:34 am

Unless you are Anglican and you pinch stuff from a supermarket and you really, really need what you are taking; then it’s OK:

WORSHIPPERS at one York church got a shock when their parish priest used the last Sunday before Christmas to advocate shoplifting.

Father Tim Jones, parish priest of St Lawrence and St Hilda, broke off from the traditional Nativity story yesterday, and said stealing from large national chains was sometimes the best option many vulnerable people had.

He told the congregation: “My advice, as a Christian priest, is to shoplift. I do not offer such advice because I think that stealing is a good thing, or because I think it is harmless, for it is neither.

“I would ask that they do not steal from small, family businesses, but from large national businesses, knowing that the costs are ultimately passed on to the rest of us in the form of higher prices. I would ask them not to take any more than they need, for any longer than they need.”

There are many benefits to being Anglican; Christmas shoplifting is just one of them.



  1. Beautiful. Just beautiful. I don’t know how you find this stuff, but don’t stop. Your attenuation to Anglican news of the weird never fails to astound me. Keep up the good work.

    Comment by David — December 21, 2009 @ 1:34 pm

  2. You just can’t make this stuff up, can you?

    Comment by Kate — December 21, 2009 @ 6:06 pm

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